The Coaching Call Center Don't Put Your Life On Hold!

Give Up!

OK, now that I’ve got your attention, let me explain. “What we resist, persists”. What is it that you want to give up to? What are you resisting? I would suggest, rather than giving up, going deep into the pain and then ALLOWING it to surface. The key word here is ‘allowing’. So often we go into the pain but then we get stuck in that very pain. Only by recognizing and going into the pain and then allowing it to surface, can that pain be released. And once the pain is released, resistance to what is melts away  and you’ll be free to move forward with your life.  

Whether we’re consciously aware of them or not, feelings are leaking out of us all the time. Whatever feelings are resonating from us is exactly what we get back. Works just like a boomerang. If you don’t like what you’re getting in your life and what you’ve created as your reality, the only way to change it is to go deep, access those feelings, allow them to come to the surface and then RELEASE them.

It’s not thoughts that create our reality, it’s our feelings that create our reality. Voyageurs of the path, and this is especially common to those that have been on the path for many years, may find that they’re experiencing situations that bring up intense emotional pain and long buried memories. The reason for this is that as we become more authentic in who we are and how we approach relationships (with ourselves and others), it becomes necessary to release any buried feelings that are no longer serving our path and who we’re becoming. Often, the only way to access those feelings are through highly emotional, highly charged situations. So, the moral of the story is, if there’s a whole lotta crap going on in your life right now and you’re feeling like “wtf, I’ve done all this work on myself and now THIS is happening?”, CONGRATULATIONS! You’re right on track and the Breakthrough is taking place even as you read this!!!”

What if everything you’ve been through in your life has happened in order to bring you to the exact place you’re in right at this moment? What if that bankruptcy, that ‘failed’ business, that love relationship you thought was going to last forever and caused massive emotional pain when you finally let it go, those friends you had to let go of in order that you could continue to go forward on your path….. what if it’s ALL happened just so that YOU could be at the exact space you’re at right this moment? What if you let go of the blame, the ‘shoulds’, all the comparisons that continue to make you feel inadequate and ‘not good enough’ and instead recognized the courage that it’s taken you to get this far in your life? Nobody but you knows the courage it takes you to go through your life on a daily basis. How about honoring yourself and welcoming in 2012 by celebrating that courage, by allowing yourself to have compassion for yourself and the little person within you and by choosing to recognize the greatness within you? I honor you and welcome you to a prosperous New Year.

“Me! Caveman! No more sitting on the ground! My butt gets sore from sitting on rocks all day!!!” Ok, so maybe that’s not what the first caveman that ever imagined a chair said. Maybe the idea of a chair was born among the Cave Ladies at the monthly community Cave Lady meeting. The Cave Ladies may have made a collaborative decision that they needed to do some self care and that included getting their butts up off the ground. Thus, the idea for the first chair was born! Their imagination created the picture in their minds, their emotions created the comfortable feeling that sitting in a chair would produce, their desire for a different life caused them to take action and voila, their butts became much more comfortable!

“Imagination is more important than knowledge.” – Albert Einstein

“Imagination is the beginning of all creation.” George Bernard Shaw

Everything in your life was given first given birth through your imagination. If you released all your conditioning, your doubts, reasons why not  and anything else that you use to keep yourself playing small and allowed yourself to imagine and feel yourself  living your life as YOU want to, what would that like look like?

How about taking some time now to sit with that picture? Just like the Cave Ladies used their imagination to create what they wanted, so can you. All you need to do is IMAGINE it!

For your complimentary coaching session, contact Joy @ Joy@callforcoaching.com or 604-435-7786

My last post gave you some suggestions for writing your 5 year plan. Have you done that yet?  Maybe your ego mind is giving you some kind of excuse as to why you would rather not take action. It might be saying something like  “If I’m going to do this I’ve got to do it right and I don’t have the time to spend on it right now!” First of all, there’s no right or wrong way to write a 5 year plan. This is for you and is yours to create however you want. It can be as brief or as detailed as you want. The main thing right now is to get started. So, if you haven’t done your 5 year plan yet, take a few moments now and write down bullet points in each of the areas I suggested in the last post entitled “What if All it Takes is One Simple Step?”

OK, great! You’ve got that down now. So, where do you go from here? Take a look at your 5 year plan and decide where you see yourself being at in half that time; in 2 1/2years.  Now break it down even more and determine where you want to be at in one year. Break that down into 6 months, 3 months, 1 month and finally, the next 4 weeks.  Now, ask youself, “What is the action I need to take in the next 24 hours?”  

Your 5 year plan doesn’t seem so insurmountable when you break it down into chunks like that, does it? From where you intend to be in 5 years to a simple action you can take in the next 24 hours. This doesn’t have to a huge, massive action. What’s important is that you take some kind of action towards your dream.  This technique is called “Starting from the End” and it’s a great way to get past the overwhelm and procrastination that can keep us stuck.

Keep at it and pretty soon you’ll be saying “Out of unstuck and living the lifestyle of my dreams! How does it get any better than this?!”

For your complimentary coaching session, contact Joy @ Joy@callforcoaching.com or 604-435-7786

Are you feeling inspired to take action towards your dreams, towards living the life you’ve always desired? Yet at the same time are you also having the feeling of not knowing where to start or what to do? Maybe you’re feeling overwhelmed by the multiple options and directions available to you and are starting to think that maybe it would be easier to just do nothing.

You might be thinking something like “I’ve got a job I don’t mind. Sure, I always like to have Friday night come by so that I’ve got the next couple days to do my thing but it’s really not that bad. At least I can pay the bills this way. Something will change eventually.” Or maybe it goes like this “He/She’s not that bad to be with. At least I don’t have to come home to an empty house. I’d rather be with the devil I know than the devil I don’t.” Or how about “I’ll get my business started eventually. First I have to take care of all this stuff and then I can spend time doing what’s really important to me”.

There are a multitude of ways we distract ourselves from doing what is really important to us and will enable us to live a life we’ve always dreamed about. But is that really getting you to where you want to go? Of course not. Distractions are just that. They distract us from working toward our dreams and goals and get us stuck in the daily grind of just living. Doesn’t sound like much fun does it? “The daily grind of just living?” Yet, that’s what most of us do. We just get by with ‘grinding out a living’. Getting fed up with hearing that phrase yet? You are? Good, cause I’m getting fed up with writing it.

I already know you want more out of live that you’re currently getting. If you didnt, you wouldn’t be reading this article. So, to get to that next step, I have a question for you…… 
 ***What is your 5 year plan? ***
If you’re still on this planet in 5 years, you’re going to be somewhere, living some kind of a lifestyle. How about starting now to make it one that YOU want to be living, not one that somebody else has decided for you. Here are a few suggestions to get you started writing that plan:

• Start with bullet points and put it all together later
• What kind of people do you surround yourself with?
• How do you dress? ie. If you’re meeting somebody for the first time, what’s the impression you want to leave them with?
• What’s your yearly financial invesment on personal growth; worskshops, books, audio programs etc?
• How much are you earning on a yearly or monthly basis?
• How much do you have in investments?
• What are your hobbies?
• Describe your social life
• What do you have for material possessions?
• Where do you travel to and what’s the style of travel you’re doing?

You can make this as detailed or as vague as you want. The most important thing now is to get something down on paper. Once you have your bullet points then put it all together using the present tense. Use “I am”, not “I want.” When you say you ‘want’ something, that keeps it in the future. Since the mind can’t tell the difference between what’s imagined and what’s real (your current physical reality), writing it in the present tense brings it into the Now.

The next article entitled “Making it Happen!” explains how to break your 5 year plan into manageble steps so that rather than feeling overwhelmed you’re feeling inspired and ready for action!

For your complimentary coaching session, contact Joy @ Joy@callforcoaching.com or 604-435-7786

During the process of change, you might find that your relationships change. People who you thought were your friends and would support you thought thick and thin might not be there for you during that time. You could find other people emerge who are there for you and support you during your time of transition. The question to ask yourself at that time is, “Does this relationship empower and support me?” If it doesn’t, then you’ll need to make a decision as to if you want that person in your life anymore. If you do, what do you need to do to ensure that the relationship supports you on your journey. That might mean spending less time with that person or might mean setting boundaries as to how you want to be treated.

Change is never easy but we can make it easier by realizing that change will be what we make of it. Decide what you want and use change to move towards how you choose to live your life. You’re the captain of your own ship, it’s not necessary to let yourself get taken in whatever direction the wind is blowing in. Decide what direction you’re heading in, set your course and guide your life in that direction. There are people who are waiting to support you in moving towards your dreams, set your sights clearly and be open to receiving the help that comes your way. You might be pleasantly surprised at what awaits you.

For your complimentary coaching session, contact Joy @ Joy@callforcoaching.com or 604-435-7786

Taking the ‘Easy’ Way Out – Is it Working for You?

It’s so easy, isn’t it? To do what you’ve always done, to take the easy way out of a situation. Why bother dealing with the ‘stuff’ when the ‘easy’ way beckons and says, “I’m here for you. I’ve always been here for you. In fact, I’m your best friend, stay with me. I know what’s best for you”.

Who is that voice that is so subtle in its ways, yet so powerful in keeping you stuck in your old patterns? That’s your ego. Replace the word ego with conditioning and you’ll see where that voice comes from. The voice that is so good at keeping you stuck and taking the ‘easy’ way out is your conditioning; the values, beliefs, ways you were taught to act and behave, how you were taught to BE as a small child that began with your primary caregivers. Once we get out in the world that conditioning becomes further ingrained from our friends, society, media, church, religion, government; the list goes on and on. While these people may have meant well and had our best interests in mind, their primary purpose was in keeping us safe. And to the ego mind, safe = same.

 When you decide to get out of the stuck place you’re in and to stop taking the easy way out, it may not feel safe. In fact, it will probably feel uncomfortable and it may even feel like you’re doing the ‘wrong’ thing. Once you begin taking action that moves you forward in life, the courage to do so will come from your wisdom and power.

Very few of us were ‘allowed to’ or given permission to stand in our power as a child. As a result, when we first start making decisions from a place of power, it could feel uncomfortable and you might be temped to keep doing what you’ve always done. Remember, to the ego safe = same. The question is, are you going to live according to your ego or are you going to live from your wisdom and power?  

What are some of the ways we give our power away to others and allow ourselves to stay stuck? You may or may not be using the following as a way to stay stuck, only you can answer that question. Keep in mind this is only a partial list, the ways we come up to keep ourselves stuck is endless. 

• Going numb rather than feeling anything
• Emotional eating
• Staying busy
• Isolating
• Drinking
• Smoking
• Negative self-talk
• Working at a job that kills your soul
• Insert your own here

If you’re feeling stuck, be honest with yourself and ask yourself what you do to keep yourself stuck. Are you going to keep doing that or is it time to change? Here are some questions you can ask yourself to get out of stuck: 

If I knew what emotional needs are being met by taking the easy way out and staying stuck, what would they be? 
How can I get these needs met in a healthy way; in a way that nurtures my soul and moves me forward in life?
Now that I know how to get what I need in a healthy way, what are some actions I can take that will move me forward in life?
What is an action I can take in the next 24 hours that will get me out of stuck and move me forward? (keep it simple, that way you’ll ensure you take the action).

You are a magnificent being, a person who deserves to feel and experience all life has to offer. Give yourself permission NOW to stand in your power and take back your life.

After all, isn’t it about time you lived life the way YOU really want to?

For your complimentary coaching session, contact Joy @ Joy@callforcoaching.com or 604-435-7786